My mother had a neighbor, I remember, who had wanted to revamp her garden but hadn’t the financial resources to achieve what she really had in mind. However, she had a son and daughter who cared, and, with a special wedding anniversary coming up, the siblings consulted two cousins who were also deeply attached to their aunt and uncle. Instead of buying separate presents, why not put in the labor? A labor of love, indeed.

The idea was to extend the flower beds around the lawn with some areas deeper than others, put in a small pond, and create a larger area for the wheelbarrow and other equipment. Simple enough, but the thought of all that work had been enough to keep delaying the project. 

Now, suddenly, it was about to take on a life of its own. The four cousins started work on a bank holiday weekend in order to give the whole thing a good boost and cleared everything unnecessary or unwanted: plants, shrubs, ornaments, odd ornamental rocks and so on. They were astonished to find ancient broken pipes, scraps of tiles and long-lost garden tools when they dug up old, large, gangly shrubs and that brought their attention to other minutia. The feeling of ‘sweeping clean’ was vastly satisfying and a clearer picture of what the garden could look like began to take shape. Suddenly, everyone became a garden designer.

The larger equipment had been squashed into a space behind the shed and it was felt that a better solution was to extend the area and make it a part of the plan, rather than trying to hide it. Several yards were staked out as an extension of the shed, edging was put in, filled with gravel, and surrounded by trellis ready for the vines and rambling roses which Mrs. Maple particularly particularly wanted. Two wide sections were erected in front, overlapping each other but with a wide enough opening for the wheelbarrow to pass through easily with planters being placed in front of each – an effective and attractive camouflage for the grotty tool area.

Over a number of weekends, the four cousins gradually changed the look of the garden, Mr. & Mrs. Maple put in a great effort themselves and other members of the family came by to help build an arbor, put in a pond, lay a brick path… whatever was helpful. After two or three months, the transformation was complete and Mr. Maple then had the problem of constantly searching for his wife with a flashlight because she lost all count of time in her dream garden.

I have suggested this sort of family effort as a Christmas or birthday present before, I know, but do consider it seriously as a group project for someone you care for. There are so many people who cannot achieve their dreams because of financial, health or age-related problems. Yet they dream, and should. A budget for such a project should naturally be set, a time limit also because this sort of thing takes a certain dedication and it’s easy to put commitments off for a week or two here and there.  It’s a good idea probably, to take time off now and then, but that should all be planned in advance so that everyone knows what to expect. As the old adage runs, “Rome wasn’t built in a day”. Think clearly about what is wanted, what is needed, and what is possible. Pace the work sensibly, taking the weather into account as well as the availability of finance and labor, and create a plan. Having done so, wait for a few days, chew on the ideas, go over the plan again, and then make a start.

And, if your family doesn’t think of this, screw up your courage and suggest it to them as a Christmas present (an early gift if your Christmases are cold), or for some other event. It may not have occurred to them and they’ll probably warm to the idea as they consider it.

Giving of one’s self is such a precious gift, and the joy it brings to others is another gift. Help someone to achieve their dream, even if it’s only driving them out one day to see a special place they have always wanted to visit, or renting an old film they love and can’t see if they don’t have a DVD player; have them round to dinner and enjoy the film with them for an evening. 

Miscellaneous Tips

Use sticky tape to remove lily dust from clothes.  Due to the ever-present moisture on your fingers, trying to wipe it off with your hand will very probably cause a stain.

For helping lighter vines, such as clematis, to climb more easily, use wire netting over walls rather than unsightly nails with cord or wire.  The netting blends into the background, whether it is wood, stone or glass. Remember to train them horizontally, rather than vertically, for more flowers.